A Word about Healthy Fellowship from 1 John 3

A friend wrote me recently to share with me some ways he knew that he lived in Alabama:

In Alabama, possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air. 

There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Alabama. 

There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Alabama, plus a couple of species that no one has ever seen before. 

In Alabama, if it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites. 

In Alabama, “Onced” and “Twiced” are words. 

In Alabama, it is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy. 

In Alabama, fire ants consider your flesh their picnic. 

In Alabama, people actually grow and eat okra. 

In Alabama, “Fixinto” is one word. 

In Alabama, there ain't no such thing as "Lunch". There's only dinner and then there's supper. 

In Alabama, “backards and forwards” means I know everything about you. 

In Alabama, “Jeet?” is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"

We are in the midst of a series in which we are studying the characteristics of Healthy Churches as described by the International Mission Board. One of those characteristics is healthy fellowship which is also a major topic in the First Epistle of John as the writer told us at the very beginning of this letter, saying, 

“. . .  that which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ.”

In 1 John 3, John wrote to tell us the ways we can know that we are living in God’s Kingdom by describing the characteristics of healthy fellowship. Let’s look at these together today.

First, We See that Healthy Fellowship is Child-like:

Verses 1 and 2 say: 

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.

In Luke 18:15-17, Jesus said that we all come to Him like a child:

Then they also brought infants to Him that He might touch them; but when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. But Jesus called them to Him and said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God. Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.”

What this means is that we all must come to Jesus with a genuine, simple faith. We must come without secret, hidden agendas and we must come prepared to receive what Jesus has for us.

We must note, however, that a child-like faith is not the same as a childish faith. Once a kindergarten child was asked by a teacher, “Are you going to eat your lunch or just sit there and stare at it?”  He answered, “I’m going to sit here and stare at it.”

To be childish is to be petulant, demanding your own way. It means to be self-centered and selfish and stubborn. Also, to be childish is to be fearful.

Paul taught in Ephesians 4:14-15, “that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ . . .” 

As Paul told us, we need to grow-up in the Lord in the same way we want our children to grow. We love to see our children crawl, then walk, then run. We love to hear them babble, then speak words, then converse.

On the other hand, if our children don’t grow, we get very concerned and we should. For example, I knew a couple who were concerned that their son was not growing. They had his joints examined to see if he was going to grow any taller. Likewise, God want us to grow spiritually as well.  If we don’t, He is saddened, as Paul expresses in I Corinthians 3:1-3:

And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual people but as to carnal, as to babes in Christ.  I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able to receive it, and even now you are still not able; for you are still carnal. For where there are envy, strife, and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like mere men?”

Next, We See that Healthy Fellowship is Pure: 

Verses 3 through 9 say:

And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure. Everyone who makes a practice of sinning also practices lawlessness; sin is lawlessness. You know that he appeared in order to take away sins, and in him there is no sin. No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him. Little children, let no one deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous. Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil. No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God's seed abides in him; and he cannot keep on sinning, because he has been born of God.

To grow good things, you must have good material!  Therefore, you don’t plant seeds in bad soil. This was a major point behind the Parable of the Sower. Rocky soil inhibits germination and growth, and weeds will choke out anything that does sprout, so farmers don’t plant seeds in soil that they haven’t prepared. In addition, they don’t neglect the watering of the seeds, nor the application of fertilizer.

The soil for spiritual growth is your heart, and if your heart is not prepared spiritually, you will not grow spiritually. If your heart isn’t pure, you will not grow and if your heart is not committed to God, you will not grow

An African proverb says that when people sit and converse, everything hidden under the bed will be pulled out and revealed. If we are not pure it will show in our lack of maturity. Consider what Jesus said in Matthew 7:15-20: 

“Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thorn bushes or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Therefore by their fruits you will know them."

Also, consider James 3:8-12:

But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring send forth fresh water and bitter from the same opening?  Can a fig tree, my brethren, bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Thus no spring yields both salt water and fresh.

God cannot abide sin! If we are to have fellowship with Him and His people, we must be pure in our hearts and in our actions.

We Also See That Healthy Fellowship Is Love: 

Verses 10 through 15 tell us:

By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother's righteous. Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.

God’s kind of love is not natural for us. 

Physical love is known to us.  

The kind of love that says “If you scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours” is known to us.

The infamous words from the movie “Love Story” are known to us and they reveal our misunderstanding of love.  It is not true that “Love means never having to say you are sorry.”

In Greek, God’s love is represented by the word Agape. The King James Version translated this term for God’s love as Charity. Agape is giving, self-less, sacrificing love. This is foreign to sinful humanity. So, God has had to teach us love

Remember, God wants us to grow, but before we can grow, we must learn love. God leads by example, so God taught us how to love by loving us.

As Acts 5:6-8 reminds us: 

For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

God didn’t try to explain His love logically. He didn’t say, “Do as I say, not as I do!” No!  He leads us and teaches us by example! And, if we are to be in His Kingdom, we must follow His lead!

Finally, We See That Healthy Fellowship Is Action: 

 

John closes this passage by reminding us that fellowship is an action word in Verses 16 through 24:

By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth. By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God; and whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him. And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. Whoever keeps his commandments abides in God, and God in him. And by this we know that he abides in us, by the Spirit whom he has given us.

Like love, fellowship is an action word. We can only show our love by our actions. We can only show our spiritual maturity by our actions. We only show our healthy fellowship by our actions. Therefore, we must be externally what we are internally. Like the saying from Alcoholics Anonymous puts it: “If what you say and what you do don’t match, then what you say is a lie and what you do is the truth!”

John’s is not the only epistle to speak of this need; James also taught this truth very strongly, as he does in James 1:21-25: 

Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues in it and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be blessed in what he does.

Clearly, the writers of both epistles were making the same point: true faith, or a healthy faith, will produce works. If there are no works that make themselves evident, then there may never have been any faith to begin with!

What are some of the works of fellowship?

We love God, and so we obey and worship Him.

We love people, and so we meet their needs.

We love God’s Word, and so we make disciples of ourselves.

We obey Christ’s commands and so we go into the world and make disciples of all people. 

Conclusion:

So, how does our fellowship match these standards? 

Are we child-like or childish?

Are we pure in our hearts, our motives, and our goals?

Are we generous and sacrificial in our love?

Are we intentional and active in our fellowship with God and people?

As a former pastor of mine liked to say fellowship is more than just Kool-Aid and cookies. He described fellowship as two fellows in one ship and that meant they were going through life together. And, as the prophet Amos asked, “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?”

I think John would agree with both men, and I also think that John would say that it is past time for our fellowship to become healthy.

Every blessing, 

Dr. Otis Corbitt